Locked Away

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

I need a miracle

I need a miracle, not a lawyer. As I said, even if I could afford one, I can not contact one. I do not know who to contact. I do not know how to choose. I can not physically contact any person other than you and the others.

I had a one, 10 minutes meeting with a lawyer. I don't know anything about my case, about my options, about how to help myself, who to talk or what to do.

Even if I had the 20K-50K for a lawyer, that's what they *start* at over here, I cannot, de-facto, technically, practically "get" a lawyer. I have no access to the outside world. Emails I sent to you, phone calls are restricted to specific pre-set phone numbers, at limited times, limited minutes, limited budget, limited phone access hours.

That's also why I can only rely on you, my friends. Without your help, there is nothing I can do.

Monday, March 2, 2015

Anti-teeth-grinding fixture

I just returned from the medic; they took blood tests. The lab guy said I should have the results in a week. I was hoping to not be here another week. That won't happen, ha?

Now I still have to fight for getting the dental anti-teeth-grinding fixture, and dental floss. I asked for some at the medic, they "won't issue that there" only through CANTINA, which run out-of-stock, as if *everybody* here floss daily. No one does, I checked with everyone, no one has it. What's up with this KOFIYA?

I need to get home. No one "important" cares yet?

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Upon release

Upon release, whenever that might be, there is a transfer to another facility named CCA.
It's a private prison, all deportations go through there.

I heard, that deportation to Israel might take as long as 14 days, unless, the deported willing to buy the ticket off his own money. So I rather have that ready. I had $1900 with the lawyer, $50 stolen, $250 deposited to commissary, less shipping my baggage, there should be enough. Please make her give you a full balance report including the stolen money and how much was each shipment.

I just saw my name set for tomorrow's medic-call, under "LAB". It should be the blood tests.

ZEDEK?

I'll always remember how N and you helped me at this time. It's about 30 meters and 16 stairs to my cell; I got there just in time to collapse on the "bed" after reading about him taking my cat's pics for me.
This place totally crippled me, I can't stand for myself, I can't protest, I have no freedom of speech (not to mention freedom at all), all that, w/o a trial. Where is ZEDEK? Oh, right, sometimes ZEDEK just a name of a star. When will it all end?

I didn't get the dental fixture for my Bruxism (how does it spells correctly?). I didn't even get a dental check yet, although asked for it three times and notified I suffer of night time teeth grinding. Actually I also asked the lawyer, so it comes to four times.
i have no dental floss either; since the KANTINA offer one kind only (the cheapest for the highest price), and they're currently out-of-stock (no one here use floss, how can they run out-of-stock?), then I have none, meaning, I might get gums inflammation. Yes, I asked for dental floss too. Same outcome as above.
The ugly KOFIYA is first class compare to Thailand; tell the consul I agree and wish him to find himself in my position one day. That could happen since the USA is madly in-love with it's prisons. I have more to write about it, if the blog is relevant, let me know.

To finish with a nicer note, let N know I'm thankful, appreciate and thinking of his efforts almost all day long and at night. I have two thinking modes here: past and future, so you're on my mind all the time. The present must not come to mind.

Night

Hey,
I'm really scared they will try to make a study case of me; I'm terrified they're going to just lock me up for months or more. Please try to do something, I know you're trying, I'm just saying, I'm scared. Please don't let them just lock me up. Someone has to care enough at some point, right? Let me know what you think. It's going to be another sleepless night for me, I hope to hear from you tomorrow's morning

Missing

Morning

The most awful time is waking up in here; like going from numb to a stinking reality, so bad it makes me close my eyes and just want to feel nothing. But it doesn't help, I look at the white break walls and the gray depressing hall again and again, trying to and I'm can't go out and can't breath air and I'm locked like a sub-human that makes a threat and is danger to society. It's unreal. It's not the way to treat people who didn't hurt others. And there is nothing I can do; unless I had friends outside, I would just be here, as long as the infamous federal "justice" system like. And they *really* don't care; they actually make money, for every day, for every inmate. They build more prisons and hire more workers, more contractors, they make their best to keep, to lockup people, deny them freedom and rights, for making money. Welcome to the USA and F*** you.

FDC Houston

About Me

On the morning of Jan.26th while visiting in USA and two days before my scheduled flight back to Israel, I was arrested by "Homeland Security" agents. Very early in the morning they knocked the hotel room door, identified as "police", ordered me to stand outside the room for a search, barefoot, wearing only pants and light T-shirt. Then they searched the room for a few minutes, while I'm still standing outside, barefoot, cold & in shock. No warrant has been shown to me.

After searching the room, they ordered me back in and sat me for a "talk". They told me they "know everything" and that I must "be honest". That phrase was repeated many times. They displayed me a waive of rights document, and told me that if I sign it and answer their questions then they will help me. Otherwise, they said, if I choose to keep my rights, they will take me to prison where I'll be locked for a long time.
For a while I answered their questions as much as I could. I did not understand all that has been said and asked, and I can't remember most of it, since I was in shock, frightened, and because English is not my native language. During all that time, other agents walked in and out of the room, searching my personal effects, opening all my packed baggage and repacking in a different order. They asked me about personal stuff I had, and exchanged remarks and smiles regarding my sex life or style.

When done with questioning me, they said I must put in writing what they consider as "main points" and sign the statement.
To my protest that I can't express myself in a clear, correct, fair way, being under so much pressure, they said that they will guide me. Again, I had no option but to write a partially dictated statement, while the agents guiding me.

At that time I still believed everything will be over soon. If only I could know at the time of my arrest that an indictment already filed to court on Jan22nd, *four days* before my actual arrest, I would have made other choices. I believe without a doubt the agents intentionally hide that fact from me.

When the agents done with questioning me, I was cuffed and taken for processing in Homeland Security building, where they took my finger prints and DNA samples. I don't know what they did with the rental car I had, and could not question any of the processing.
When done at "homeland Security", I was delivered to Federal Detention Houston. Processing there included a complete body X-ray scan. I had no option to refuse that high amount of X-ray radiation.
Through the whole process I've been objectified as if I were a non-living package. All my prescribed medicine taken to "extermination". I had zero ask or say about any of that. At that point I truly believed I'm going to get a thyroid shock and will die there.

Being diagnosed as ADD + major depression since 2003, in addition to Grave's disease since 1995, I have suffered an extreme emotional stress and physical anxiety that made me feel as if I'm dead, watching myself outside my body.

The next morning I was brought in front of a judge. A lady who introduced herself as from Federal Public Defense told me what to answer in response to the judge questions, while we're standing in front of him. Being weak and frightened, I cannot remember a thing of what been said there.

Later I was taken to processing by US Marshals. Just by chance I managed to explain my religious needs and to hold my transfer to another facility which won't support my Jewish religion.
50$ were taken out of my money and shown to me as if it will be deposited to my inmate commissary account. Those 50$ never arrived in my commissary account.

For the next three weeks I had to relay on other inmates "favors" which I could not and should not refuse. As for my personal hygiene, I received 10ml of soap (or less) for each day. I couldn't wash my hair, clip my nails or clean my ears. I still have a month long nails growing.

On Jan.29th I was taken to court again. The Public Defender attorney appointed to my case met me for a 10 minutes talk. Then, in front of the judge, I answered as directed by her. After 10 hours in legs and hand-to-waist cuffs, I've been delivered back to detention center.
On re-processing, I was forced to "donate" my clothes and shoes to "charity". I had no other option.

It is now 4 weeks since my arrest; I had one 10 minutes meeting and two phone calls with my appointed attorney. Also one 20 minutes meet with an investigator of that office. I don't know anything about what's going to happen.

I'm getting about half of the medical care I need. The Israel embassy and Foreign Affairs Ministry, completely ignoring me, and refuse to help my friends help me.

My life in Israel is falling apart; I'm being punished before trialed. I'm getting less than minimal legal advice.

Calling friends people who can help me is limited in minutes and costs more than 6 SHEKEL per minute. It also limited by phone usage hours, call duration and time differences.

I'm helpless, threatened by the USA Federal "justice" system. They can and they do to me what ever they decide, I have no say about my life, nothing to hold on to. I'm lost.

I beg whoever reads this, please help me before it's too late. I'm 42 years old, without any criminal record. I will share all my case details with anyone who can help.

Please help me get back Home.